I am lonely tonight, missing some people and places and circumstances, feeling guilty about others. I do not know how this cloud develops over me sometimes, but I realize, often suddenly, that I am sad. Maybe the cloud metaphor is all wrong. Quicksand would be more appropriate.
Of course, I have no right to own this self pity. My life is full of wonder and light. People are good to me. I have wonderful, talented children. My grandchildren are perfect.
The quicksand doesn't care. So I try to move through the day mired and foggy. Movement, especially emotional, comes slowly and only with great exertion. And that cloud or fog makes perception impossible.
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