Application

In order to present myself in my best light when applying for a job, I must convince myself that I have a very real chance of landing the position. I have to want it, be passionate about it, see myself as the person performing it. In the meantime, I must continue on the job I already have, the one that now seems so unsatisfactory. I submit a long application, a personality questionnaire, my resume, a letter. I interview with administration and also with a committee of peers. During the one-on-one, I again answer personality questions. The committee asks more job related questions, but sometimes it is difficult to detect the nuances they expect. I try not to second guess. Instead, I go with what comes to mind and I give each meeting my all. I think the interview has been positive, but then I thought the same about that previous position. I was so comfortable, but someone else was hired. When I inquired, the director pointed out that my specific experience was not enough. Did they really need to get my hopes up to discover that the experience on my resume was lacking? Did they enjoy my performance?

But I must protest too much. Whoever gets the job has to jump through the same hoops. It's all part of the loosely choreographed dance that continues into the relationships once employment occurs. Allowing my optimism to slip away does no one any good. Like getting in shape for a sport, if I choose to seek a new job, then I will go through the required motions with the expected attitude.